First Date Tips: Dont be Anal and Lube up the Conversation

Girls and guys have a knack for scrambling for advice for first dates. Advice on what to wear, what to say, what to eat, and how to act can flood a person even before they have plans for the date set. Although some of the tips and suggestions are worthy, there is plenty of advice out there that is just downright bad. Here are some of the best tips to help keep your first date from also becoming the last date. We have all heard the advice just be yourself. True, this is good advice, but frequently it is hard to do. It is not easy being yourself when you are nervous about every little move you make and every little word you say. However, with all of the other advice that comes and goes, remember that being yourself trumps everything else when it just feels right. First of all, while you are on the date, if it is going exceptionally well it is easy for most of us to start immediately thinking of the future. Could she be the one Ive been looking for? Is he my Prince Charming for good? Stop thinking of the future and get a grip on the present. If you spend every minute with your date thinking of the future, youll spend important time with them constantly evaluating how its going and stressing about whether or not they are into you, if you are doing things right, or if he thinks you are a dork. Spending all of your mental time in the future robs the present of your attention, which could ultimately spell disaster because that means that you are not as engaged with your date as you should be. Along those same lines, keep in mind that a first date is an experiment, not a trial for marriage. Youll want to be honest with your date, but be tasteful and selective. Being honest on the first date does not include spilling your guts about the weird encounter you had in high school (it must have been aliens). If you are unsure about if you should talk about something or not, on the first date it is better to leave some things unspoken. Honesty is important when it comes to things like fears or minor weaknesses. Talking to someone about how you are terrified of bees or afraid of heights can make the person feel more comfortable around you simply because it proves that you are more human. Another great piece of advice for that first date is to go a little crazy; come out of your shell just a little bit. Were not talking about convincing your date to streak the mall, we are suggesting little things like singing to your favorite song in the car or dancing a bit while you are out at the club. Being a little bold shows that you have character and a passion for life. Not only that, but the unexpected things in life are those that we find interesting and amusing. What could be more fun than being with someone who is entertaining and intriguing? Finally, an instant connect technique recommended by experts is something called mirroring. Pay attention to your dates body language, and mirror that. Of course we dont mean to literally make them feel like they are looking into a mirror (that would be weird) but if she leans in and sets her elbows on the table, you should lean in and set an arm on the table. He leans back a bit and gets comfy, then you should get comfy too. It shows both people that they are more on the same page than if one is leaning in close with all eyes on their date and the other is laid back looking at everything but their date. Good luck!